Josh

Not much riding this week. I'm on call Monday, Wednesday, and Friday, Saturday Sunday. This means work, work, and more work. And oh, by the way, no riding to work as well.

Hopefully I'll ride Tues and Thurs.

I've decided to write about anything on this blog, bike related or not, so here we go.

Yesterday was a joyous, stressful and emotionally draining day. I had to interview my friend Josh in front of our church family of about 2000 folks. Three services of 700 people each. We told his story and how he's dealing with things. See below:

Josh is 31, has two young daughters, a beautiful wife, and has cancer. Bad brain Cancer. Anaplastic (grade III) Astrocytoma to be specific. The books say it can't be cured. So, despite surgery in 10/2005, followed by chemo and radiation, all we (I say we as in modern medicine, I am not involved in his care) have accomplished is lengthening his life for an unspecified period of time, usually less than 2-3 years. Unless miraculously cured, these tumors always come back fatally.

I met Josh 4 months after his surgery at the Heights. He was chasing his kids and mine around the playground growling at them like a monster. I liked him immediately. The scar on his head was obvious, and since I'm a surgeon and interested in scars, we talked about it. Well we sort of talked because the tumor and surgery had affected Josh's speech area and he has trouble getting words out. His speech has impreved since then, but is still very halting. He grew up in Japan speaking fluent Japanese. That in pretty much all gone.

Turns out Josh and family live about 3/4 mile away in our neighborhood, so we got together as families and have deepened our friendship over the last year.

Part of our friendship actually revolved around bikes. Josh couldn't drive after the surgery due to seizure risk, and needed some transportation for around town. Since I have usually had an over abundance of bikes in the garage the last few years, I set him up with a Titus Locomoto I was parting out as a commuter. Found enough parts to get him going and off he went.

At first Josh was unsure if he would be even able to ride a bike again after the surgery. As it is, however, it was like riding a bike, and he had no issues at all. I still remember the first trial ride at Pioneer park, he on the much too big for him Curtlo, and me on the SS. It was really a big step in his recovery because I think he felt for the first time that he was not an invalid, just couldn't talk too well. Sort of like, "if I can ride a bike, how bad can I really be."

We started running a bit together as well. As his fitness improved, he started to drop me while riding hills as all shorter, wiry guys tend to do eventually.

I needed to part out the Titus, and he wanted to try a rigid SS bike for all around. He was mainly riding for transortation, and only rarely going off road so the Titus didn't suit him well. He also wanted to pay his own way. I let him trial the SS Monkey and he liked the big wheels. As Providence would have it, Dan decided to sell one of his Monkeys around the time Josh needed it, so money changed hands and Josh couldn't be happier. 32 X 18 all the time. (Dan gave him a good deal too).


Here is Josh demoing my Monkey and "driving through" the pharmacy.



Here is the Josh Monkey built by Fixedgeardan. It feels fast and is aesthetically pleasing, like all of Dan's bikes.


Josh takes a day at a time. One thing that sustains him, are the Words of Jesus in Matt: 6:33-34:

"But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own."

He said this verse was a great comfort to him in dealing with life long before the cancer diagnosis, but is more precious now.

Josh says he could have died already, multiple times, so each day is a gift. If he has a bad attitude that day, that is essentially a lost day of life for him. If he has a good attitude, that is a good day.

As I think about his attitude, and the words above, I can only come to the same conclusion. I am not promised 30 more years, or indeed even another hour or day. This leads me to conclude that you have to decide what you are living for and live by that in the moment you have right now.

As I have thought and prayed over this, I keep coming back to 1 Cor 10:31:

"So whether you eat, or drink, or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God"

I've been in the medical business a while, and I have never seen a miraculous cure. I've never wanted to see one more than now.

Do I believe God can cure this cancer..absolutely. Do I believe God loves Josh..absolutely. I hope he will be cured and that we can look forward to years of riding together as our kids grow up together, but I lack his faith.

So we have each day, every day.